Dead Man

He was on fire. People were happy and drunk and he made them even happier by hitting every Dire Strait lick perfectly. Nothing could have been better for the day. Fancy dress, pretty guitar, beautiful girls and his gleaming face. It was for times like these he lived but then times like these were never meant to last. The gig was over, the bar had to rest and get ready for tomorrow. And then he was back to his rags with the dress and the guitar taken away. Only things that remained the same were drunk faces and beautiful girls leaving the place and of course the gloomy nights and the gloomy days that lay ahead.

“Hey you played really well today, what is your name”?

“Avi“, replied the shy talent.

“I was going to have another drink Avi, would you care for one“, asked the young man.

 He was clean shaved, and had peculiarly loud expression. His eyes were saying something, had something unusual about them, Avi was thinking. What was it? Whatever it was Avi could still use a free drink.

“A drink would be nice but the bar is closed“, said Avi.

“I know a place, come along“.

The night was thick and streets were empty, they lived in a city where night life was meant for only two types of men. Those who didn’t really had a job to be attended in the morning, they were called bums. And those who didn’t needed a job, they were the spoilt offsprings of the elite class.

It was a ten minute walk which led them to a bar hidden behind a shady shutter. The place didn’t look very inviting but the beer worked just fine.

“Hey, why don’t you give me guitar lessons“? asked the man.

“Because I don’t give guitar lessons. “

“Why don’t you give guitar lessons? “

“Because I don’t feel like giving Guitar lessons. “

“Why can’t you use little money, you don’t seem to have much. “

“Oh come on man, you are not going to counsel me on my financial affairs are you? “

“It’s okay, “the man slowly placed his hands on his thigh. Then his hand slowly reached for his crouch. That was it. Avi understood what his eyes were trying to say when they first met. In no time Avi was on his way home. Home was a very fancy name for a stinky, dingy kind of place he lived in. It was a shack that has not been cleaned in a lifetime. It had a leaking roof, broken windows, some broken furniture that would settle for half a wardrobe and three quarters of a bed and yes, a wife.  

 “Where have you been, and with whom have you been, “his wife started pig of a fight as soon as he reached home. 

“Don’t you know you have a wife to attend? “

“I was with a guy, Shelly. “

“So now you were with a guy. You filthy piece of shit, now you are interested in men. First you couldn’t decide a career for yourself and now you can’t decide your sexual preferences. What kind of a man you are? Will you ever settle down for once or are you going to be an entirely new person everyday for the rest of your life? “

Shelly did not know that he just managed to save himself from man pounding instead of going in for one, but whatever she said surely had some truth in it. Avi was a fickle minded man. All these years he was busy doing something new each day. He couldn’t pick up a career because nothing amused him for long enough. He had been a painter, a writer, he played almost all the instruments and he has also worked as a mechanic. In all these years of poverty he had changed his jobs more frequently than he had changed shirts. Perhaps the only thing he never tried was dance.

“I think I will learn Salsa. Are you listening Shelly? I am saying I will learn Salsa. “

“Now where did that come from? “ she replied in an irritated tone.

“My mother always wanted me to learn dance. “

“Your mother wanted you to become a doctor. “

“But I am haemophobic. “

“Last I checked you didn’t like dance either. “

“I still don’t like dance. “

“I was thinking of learning it for my mother. Okay fuck dancing what else should I do? I want to do something.  “

“We have been living on a meal a day from almost a month now and all you are concerned about is trying out something new to amuse yourself. Why don’t you consider dying that would be some real fun, you asshole. “

“That certainly could be done. All I ever wanted from life was dying young and famous. Fame I don’t think belongs to me what is the harm in dying young then. I have lived, tried and breathed almost everything by now. I guess I will better be dead now. “

“You are sick and I am leaving, “she had already begun packing her stuff.

“It was your Idea, “he said almost baffled. “And do not leave right now. “

“I never expected that you would want me to stay. “

“I am not asking you to stay. All I am saying is, it is 3 o’ clock right now, where will you go at this hour. Wait till the Sun shows, fuck me goodbye and then leave. See I am a caring husband. “

Shelly gathered her belongings, she didn’t had much, slapped him goodbye and left. Avi and his thought of dying sat alone for the rest of the night. He kept wondering what went wrong. It was Shelly only that had stuck as constant all these years to his ever miserable life. But things started to change lately, his fondness for her had already begun fading and today she left. Avi’s Shelly left today. Rest of the night went by with Avi pondering over prospective ways to commit a suicide.

It was morning and his already pathetic place was in an even worse shape with the mattresses cut open, utensils on the floor and wardrobes been robbed brutally by their very own master. All this drill was conducted in the hope of finding the last crisp of money sitting somewhere in hiding. He found enough money to buy some cheap liquor and pills for himself. He got pills of every color and kept them close like a five year old would do with his candies. Avi picked up a pen and a paper to write a suicide note. What could have he possibly written in a suicide note? He was not unhappy, he was poor but comfortable with his condition, he didn’t owe money to anybody, and he couldn’t find a cause that would convince a suicide note. He wanted to die simply because he didn’t have anything else left to do. So he threw away the pen and the paper and relaxed with the company of his newly bought bottle. Soon he was drunk and took all the pills, all at the same time. He always feared that he would die alone and here he was dying all by himself. A sudden fit of anger caused him to throw anything within his reach to anywhere in the house. The clinking and crashing was way too loud for a quiet afternoon.

“What happened to you? “said a beautiful voice. “Are you all right now? “

The voice was beautiful but not very clear to him. Avi couldn’t make out where he was lying; all he could see were bright gleaming spots of light. 

I am the Salsa trainer from across the street was the last thing he heard.