Life Goes On

                              Life Goes ON.

"Daddy has become unconscious. I am taking him to Jupiter hospital" mom said crying inconsolable over the phone.

"I'll get bachcha ready for school and come to you as soon as possible. Take care of daddy and don't cry. Be strong mommy." I told her trying to keep myself calm as I cut her call.
But the truth was I was shaken. Just as much as mom was.

"What happened bhai? What happened to daddy?" My younger sister asked me.
"Nothing happened bachcha. He is just feeling uneasy so mummy has taken him to the hospital." My phone rang as I explained this to her.

"Daddy is no more. He left us in this world alone son, he has left us alone." Mom cried over the phone. I had never heard her so broken. So shattered. So alone.

"I'm coming mom. I'll be there in 10 minutes."

"Bachcha,  mummy is saying daddy is no more. But I'm not sure. Let me go and check. You get ready and go to school." I told my sister.

" I will come with you" She said completely determined, shattered, crying and not ready to believe all at the same time.
"Get ready and go to school!!" I said getting angry. "Let me handle mom. Carry your phone. I'll let you know what happens. It's your 10th, you need to study." She accepted reluctantly with tears continuously running down her eyes.

Me, my mom's cousins who reside in the neighbouring building started for the hospital.
"He is cool. He is not reacting. He will take it. He can take of her" I heard my uncle speak over the phone. But he did not know I was crying. I had an empty feeling. I was feeling vulnerable.  I had lost my protector.

"He left us. He left me. He left me so soon. Why did he leave me and go? Why did he leave us and go?" Mom cried inconsolably over my shoulder hugging me tightly. Rahul mama hinted at me saying let her cry. Let her get it all out. At that instant i decided i will not cry.

I sat beside dad's body in the ambulance holding his hand. The smile on his face, the smile of satisfaction bought a tear to my eye. It also gave me the strength I needed. He had taught me to fight no matter what.

"Stop crying bachcha." I tried to console my sister who just hugged me tight on seeing daddy's body.
"Why are you crying when you know he never liked you crying? He never let you cry and now you're gonna tell him goodbye crying?" I tried to pacify her.
"I don't want him to go. I want him with me. Standing by me." She cried out loud. 
"Just like you love him and want him, he too wants his mother and wants to be with her. Give him a smile and say goodbye. He will always be there with you. Even you know that." I told her. She understood. Stopped crying and made him a promise. Promised him to fulfill all the dreams he had for her.

" I want 50kgs ghee. And gold nuggets and 500 coconuts for his last rites" demanded my father's elder brother. He was a dual faced personality who had sent goons to get work done from dad without paying him what he deserved.

"Give me the keys to his office. I will handle all his clients and work from now on and give your child the money." Said the brother completely eyeing dad's office just moments after the last rites.
"I don't know where the keys are. I'll search and ill let you know when I find them." Mom replied.
He left the house stampeding without performing any further rituals needed for daddy.

" We will perform the further rituals" my mom's sisters and their husbands said together. Masi's and masa's have always been my 2nd parents. I've grown in their arms.

,Days passed by. The house felt emptier day by day. I out of habit kept calling his number at 9 30 to ask him where should I pick him up from only to find the phone ringing in the house. I had just landed up a job 15 days ago and dad was super happy but he couldn't even wait to see my first salary.

After seeing the entire situation mom decided she would take up dad's office and clients and continue working. Being a lawyer by profession mom barely understood the ABC's of Accounts.

"Mom you get back to your courts and cases. Let's give up daddy's files to his best friend whose always stood by him. You will not be able to handle it anymore." I told mom. No one from dad's side came forward to help her with the office being professional accountants. Mom did tutions, handled the office, managed the house only to keep us standing. She was broken completely but she never let us know.

"You will not stay at home. You will not do tutions but just go out and work. Move out of the house and work for your cases." I told her determined and angry when  I saw her cry. She reluctantly moved out. A few months  and she forgot about her emptiness for a while. Yes it's always there but at the back of her mind because the front is occupied with work. Yes she cries but only when she is reminded of the memories with daddy. Yes she stood up. She's standing strong for us.

In all of this we had sort of ignored my sister in the entire struggle to stand back up. She was in her 10th and her board exams were due in 6 months.

"I hope she studies and just passes her exams. Should we talk to a few people and have her admissions secured?" Mom asked me completely worried.

"Let her study mom. I'm confident she will do well. And I have no problems even if she scores a 40% or fails the exam. Let her do it on her own. Let her stand up on her own." I told mom. Though at the back of the mind I was a bit worried too. Her friends had told me that she used to cry in school the 1st few weeks.

"Study regularly. I don't have any expectations from you. I don't mind even if you fail. But just give in your best. Daddy always wanted you to study hard." I tried motivating her not knowing I was in for a shocker.
" I have promised him I'll score 90+ in the boards and study hard and become an IAS officer. I will study hard no matter what and fulfill his dream." She told me. She had a sparkle and determination in her eyes.

She studied hard regularly. Not the extreme ones like getting up at 4 or late night studies, just simple regular studies. She went for her exams. Mom would be worried every single day about what was going to happen. She ought to be.

"I scored a 92% bhai." She screamed over the phone announcing her results to me. I had tears in my eyes. Tears of happiness. She had done it and how. She had beaten my percentage even after going through a turmoil.

"Wish daddy was here to see your result" mom cried with a gentle smile on her face.

Life goes on. Does not stop. It's upto you to choose what do you want to do. Keep crying and keep the person gone unhappy or smile and fulfill the dreams they had for you.

As for me he had a dream to see me become a big industrialist in India. And I am on my way to work hard and fulfill his dream. Miss you daddy. You will always walk with us, protecting us. I know.

This is a true story. My own story. I lost my father a year ago. 15th July 2013.

Love by chance?

"Do I love her? Should I tell her? She will be shifting cities soon. I might not see her ever again. Does she love me too?"

These thoughts are running into my head as I lay down in bed. Suddenly a movie starts running through my head showcasing the beautiful memories I've had with her.

"Hey your phone will fall off from your pocket." I said pointing at her phone which was kept in the back pocket of her trousers. She removed her phone and held it in her hand giving him a angry look. That is how we met for the 1st time at the college canteen.

"You cannot be the comperer for the event. You're too silent and calm. We need someone lively and bold." I told her. I was recruiting for the college festival which was due in a month.

"Guys let's go out and take a break. We've worked enough for the week. Where do you guys want to go? "

"Marine Drive" was a unanimous answer from the group.

"This is so beautiful. This is the best place I've ever been my whole life. Wish I could stay here my entire life." Exclaimed her looking at the cloudy sunset showcasing the multi shaded sky in tinges of grey blue and orange.

"Close your eyes and feel the sea talk to you. It takes away every pain of your life. It makes you lighter but most importantly never judges you." I told her. She looked at me astonished.
"Do it!! " I insisted her.

"I've never felt so free in my life. I've always fought for freedom. I love my mom but she's too protective of me. She starts calling me by 5 30 to return home. I want to travel. I want to see the world. But I don't want to hurt my mom. " she said with a tear in her eye.

"We keep ignoring the love and care when we have it but keep searching for it the rest of our lives.They trust you but they do not trust the world. Enjoy your freedom, love and care till you have it together because once anyone of them is gone you keep searching for it for the rest of your life." I said with a stern voice.

" You're pretty straight forward."

"That's why I'm hated by most and loved by few"

She smiled.

"You look like a sparrow."
"Your nose is bigger in proportion to your face"

"I don't look like a sparrow" I replied angrily. She laughed her heart out.

I fell in love with her smile. The innocent smile of freedom and faith. Smile after a struggle. A genuine struggle to not hurt the ones we love. I fell in love with her eyes that sparkled.
I fell in love with her.

"What's on between us?" She asked me with a blush and smile on her face making a mash up of her try to keep a poker face.
She was looking for an answer. A specific answer. I don't know what but those eyes just had love. Pure love.

"I don't know". I said with a diplomatic tone trying to keep a poker face and smile away from my face. All of a sudden it starts raining adding to the feeling. Music was definitely playing in our heads. Both had smiles on our face. A face of content.

"I don't want to complicate things. I don't want to hurt my mom. Nobody stays together forever." She said in a dismayed manner.

"Leave the complications to me. If you're sure you're not crossing any limits, not making any mistakes, convince your mom on what you're doing is right. She will rebel for a while trying to protect you. Do not push too much. Give it time. Convince her step by step that nothing's wrong and you're on the path of independence and you're confident of the fulfilling your responsibilities. She will understand with time." I told her with a calm tone.

She looked into my eyes with satisfaction and confidence as if she found what she was looking for. I needed time. Time to take things into my stride. Time to keep the smile on her face intact.

But I was sure. I had fallen in love with her.
I would tell her. Tell her with time. Taking one step at a time.

Salty Coffee

 He met her at a party. She was so beautiful, many guys were chasing

after her, while he was so plain and simple, nobody paid attention to him.

 At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she

was surprised, but to be polite, she consented. They went to a nice

coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt

uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me go home.... suddenly he asked the waiter..."would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."

Everybody stared at him, How strange! His face turned red, but still,

he put the salt in his coffee and drank it.

 She asked him curiously; why you have salt in your coffee? He replied:

"when I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I like playing in the

sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty

coffee.

 Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood,

think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who still live there". While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was

deeply touched.

 That's his true feelings, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can

share his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about

home, has ties to his home.

 Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her

childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful

beginning of their story.

 They continued to date. She found that he was actually a man who meets

all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed knowing him! Thanks to his salty coffee!

 The story ended just like every beautiful love story , the princess married the prince, then they lived happily ever after... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in it, as she knew that's the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest, please forgive me, I have been lying my whole life. This was the only lie I told you---the salty coffee.

 Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time,

actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change it, so I just went ahead.I never thought that could be the start of our

conversation! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you about anything. Now I'm dying,

I'm afraid of nothing so I can tell you the truth: I don't like the

salty coffee, what a strange bad taste.. But I have had the salty coffee for

my whole life!

Since I met you, I don't ever feel sorry for everything I did for you.

Having you with me is the biggest thrill of my whole life. If I can live

a second time around, I would still want to know you and have you for the

rest of my life,even though I have to drink the salty coffee again".

Her tears made the letter totally wet. One day, someone asked her: how

did the salty coffee taste? It was very sweet, she replied.

Love is not to forget but to forgive, not to see but to understand,

not to hear but to listen, not to let go but to HOLD ON !!

Moving on

Sometimes people change like the seasons.

And I'm not saying that I'm so perfect 

But I gave you my heart 

And you stomped on it

But at a certain point the memory of her stopped accompanying me everywhere I went. I stayed behind, the way a city stays behind as a train pulls out of the station. It's there, somewhere behind you, and you could go back and make sure of it. But why should you?

it's taken me awhile, but i'm learning  

that letting go of the past is a good thing.

it doesn't mean forgetting, it just means 

moving on. and you can't enjoy the present 

when you're stuck in the past

I want to say I deserve better & mean it

I want to say I give up & believe it

I want to say I'm moving on, & do it.

She was my best friend. 

The one who made me laugh, 

when I didn't feel like smiling. 

The one who made me feel so secure, 

when I was scared. 

And the one, who I fell completely in love with.

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, its learning to dance in the rain. It's singing in the car when you don't even know all the words.It's giving your whole heart to someone, even if you're a little scared at first. It's about taking risks and making life worth living because every minute you waste is a minute you'll never get back. 

But now i realise whatever happens happens for the good. Moving away from her was the best thing that could ever happen to me. That got me even closer to my mother and sister. The amount of time and energy i spent on her had drained me emotionally. In her pursuit i had forgotten about the two beautiful women of my life who have always been there for me without me even trying for them.

That is when it struck me. True love does not require to appease a woman 24x7 365 days a year. You do not have to run around her like a mad dog with your tongue out. It is as simple as your relationship with your mother and sister. You feel happy. You do things for them without any expectations and so do they.

Memories hit you. They hit you hard. You want them back desperately and that is when you have to be strong enough to stop yourself. Have people around you who are positive, but if you do not have any just get yourself angry at the smallest thought of them. Will hurt you for a while but doesn't something that does not kill you make you  stronger?

A true relationship never demands anything. Always gives you back. 

How Far Would You Go To Get Closer To Someone?

Couples go to extremes to be close to the people they love. They fight, they lie, they hide, commit blunders only for a few moments of passion and love with their loved ones. Couple of days a friend and me had a conversation about how he traveled 1500 kilometers only to be with his girlfriend but in the end all he got was to see her in the arms of another man. I burst out laughing. Annoyed he asked me this question that how far would you go to get closer to someone?

 I was perplexed at his reaction. It was as if I had never done anything for him. I did not answer him. Just stayed quiet for him to calm down. Looking at the setting sun out of the local train window i started thinking about How far would i go to get closer to someone?

I got deeper and deeper into my thoughts and flashes and memories of friends and relatives who had moved away from me came to mind. And a smile came across my face as something dawned upon me. People are always close to you in your and their memories. Be it good or bad. As long as people think about you you are always close to them. I would go to any extent to create good memories to get close to someone.

In all of ego, busy schedules, society reputations we simply forget to appreciate and develop the good things people around us do for us or society. We take them for granted and always expect them to do it always. In the whole process our helping hand and appreciation gets us close to them in the end creating good memories and getting them closer.

In all of our lives memories are the only thing that remain constant even after we are gone. I would go to any extent to help people, appreciate them, make them smile and support them always when they make mistakes. Maybe that is when everyone will be equal without any discrimination and close to each other.

Friendzoned

Vikrant is a mysterious creature, but easily decipherable.

Standing at 6'4 he sees the world as a big ball of chocolate ready to be eaten. A very mature kid at the age of 23 i guess would think as he does. 

Rohan is a philosophical straight forward creature, but easily breakable at heart. A super struggler of the same age who has seen a lot of things happening around him as a kid would think as he does.

Vikrant and Rohan are budding engineers who have just got into the college of not their liking. Both of them are waiting in the line to fill up their induction forms when both of them see each other. Neither of them smile as they are all tensed up in the hurry of filling up their forms. They just glance and move out.

"That is the 1st Angle of projection" was a reply from both of them together. The entire class of the first year of BE Mechanical look at both the guys in awe. That is the 1st time both Rohan and Vikrant looked at each other and smiled. A satisfied smile. 

"I was at St Lawrence High School until 10th." 

"We were in junior colleges right opposite but we didnt know each other" was a happy reply from Rohan. That's how their friendship began.

Vikrant is a well read guy. Has a lot of practical knowledge, but hasn't been too out in the world. He Knows what is struggle and is ready to fight it out his only problem being he thinks everybody in the world is good. Again it is more because of his innocent child inside him. He is mad after cars not too much for their looks but for the technology that goes inside them. He loves Maria Sharapova. Judging by his taste you would have understood the amount of connection he would have with girls-NIL. But he is a guy any girl would be lucky to have. She only has to handle two things-His innocent kid nature and his paunch.

Vikrant and Rohan soon became close friends. Maybe because they had the same wavelength or maybe the same dreams or maybe the same aspiration of designing whacky stuff. Soon Vikrant used to put his well read ideas onto paper with added innovations and Rohan applied his skills to analyse them for practicality and feasibility. Time passed and they became inseparable. They Understood each other as if they have known each other since ages. An eye contact and they knew what was in the other person's mind.

Rohan had a inferiority complex and hated the world for its dual faced actions because of all that he had seen as a child. He had lied to everyone he met in his new life about his work only to get their attention. He lied to his girlfriend too. And the rest i guess you would have already guesssed. Yes, she decided to move away even though she loved him.

Rohan described the entire chain of events to Vikrant but describing it to be a story of his friend. With no experience with Girls Rohan was completely surprised and satisfied with the solution Vikrant had provided him.Maybe that is why Vikrant was in the best-Friendzone.

Vikrant's patience to listen, understanding nature and calmness with innocence are just the contrasting traits of his music collection and reaction to panic situations. Walls become his punching bag. His red face a warning indication to stay away. His weird but silent methods, whacky reactions all just constitute a beautiful balanced personality ready to accept challenges and change the world. But the world does not change by being as good and sweet as chocolate does it? Too much sweetness causes diabetes  and thats his problem.

Always good to people even when they are using him and taking credit away for all the hard work he puts in. Maybe that is because of the kid in him. Keep him alone without work and that will get the animal out of him. He always has something on his mind. always. Look into his eyes and his expression and eye movement and you will know what is inside his head. Patience and debate is the only way to handle and deal with. Get things out of him via a debate and you will have understood him.

He barely insults people but when he does its always in indirect speech as if he is writing a novel. Friendzoned i suppose?
Rohan is just a secondary character in the Friendzone.

Vikrant's boasts of knowledge, understanding but lacks ability to fight for things or the system or negativity. Panic attack. Just fight, sometimes with your kid nature and sometimes without. But do fight and take and make things for yourself rather than waiting for things to happen.

Keep smiling and make people smile as you always do. And never lose the kid in you.
Entropy is the ultimate truth but balancing and controlling entropy much better. Wrong choice of words i suppose?

Winning

Every living being on earth has a different perspective about winning. Some want to win for mankind, some want to win for pride, some want to win for ego, but majorly everyone wants to win for survival. As they say in a blockbuster movie " beta yahan toh race lagi hai, 1st nahi aaoge toh log tumhe kuchal kar aagey chale jayenge"

Winning or losing is just a matter of perspective. A matter of choice. A simple matter of goals. Winning for me is simple. Happiness and satisfaction of my family along with me is my victory.

A smile on my mother's face. Pride and satisfaction on my sister's face, daddy's dreams coming true but most of all simple dreams of my life fulfilled by my hardwork.

Winning for includes the happiness of society and mankind as a whole. Too big am expectation I suppose? But the solution is simple.

Spread smiles without expectations. By spreading smiles I do not mean splurge money. Don't do things for people but don't ruin things for people. Do not ridicule people. Do not look down upon them.

Winning in a competition is not winning. Never was, never will be. Kill unhealthy competition because competition is for development and not for survival or killing or defeating people. Competition should be a platform for development and growth of new things, innovations and not a platform for unfair mal practice. Victory is not in pulling down someone. We will win when we develop and grow with everyone around us. Taking them forward with us or we moving forward with them rather than pulling everyone back.

Compete and win against yourself. Be better than what you were yesterday. Compete against your mistakes and fight them. When you feel the inner satisfaction of defeating yourself. That is the time when you will win. We will win. Society will win. Mankind will win.

Move forward taking everyone with you and if you can't support people who can take everyone forward.

Marriage

I was going through this series of questions on a website when I found a question stating 'What should you ask a guy or girl when you meet him for the 1st time for the proposal of an arranged marriage?'
The most common replies I read were ask him about his hobbies etc. What are you going to do about hobbies? You barely have time for yourself that you will go for hobbies together? Bleh. How would you know about the person by asking about his hobbies??.
  Simply asking him 2 simple questions.

1st. Describe your struggles in life.
Prompt reply would be a full show off answer saying I fought through this I did that I built this facing this blah blah blah.. without any conviction or pain or worth of the struggle he has put in. Move out as soon as possible. He has not felt any pain or struggled in life.

2nd. Define  happiness in life according to you.
Money, property, party, fun if are the replies move out.

Simple questions define the entire life history of a person.
An honest hard working person will always value his struggle and have pain in his eyes and voice when he speaks about his struggles. He will stutter, be shocked at the question, but with complete humility answer the question.

For him happiness will be simple. Family and their happiness. Spouse, kids, parents, a satisfactory job with growth, or business aspirations, but will always have a sparkle in his eyes when he speaks of happiness.

Any person can be gauged by simple face gestures and eyes and his philosophy and principles in life.
Even when philosophies and principles are food how he speaks of them is of more importance which is the simplest way a person in this world senses and feels about people.

In the end even after all this, a simple spark is enough to start the fire of true love even if it's through arranged marriage.
Do not keep any expectations in your mind when you meet someone. Just look into their eyes and the conviction with which they speak both at the same time.

Maybe you keep looking for your superman but clark Kent would have already passed you 100 times or would be standing in front of you. Stay happy and stay committed for life.

Woman

This post is purely my views and understanding of a woman. I do not mean to offend or hurt anybody. A few of my friends asked me about how do you understand women. They kept saying it is too complicated, they are too unpredictable etc. The one question they kept asking me is how do you understand women?

A mother, A wife, A daughter, A sister, A grandmother are a few roles we know about a woman. She is a friend, God mother, agony aunt, leader, cook, soul mate, storehouse of energy too are a few roles a woman performs but are just taken for granted by the world.

Understanding a woman is complicated but simple. It all depends on her mood, her thought process, her expectations, her attitude, her fighting nature are just a few permutations and combinations which have to be put straight. Simply look into her eyes and see what feeling it has. Anger and pain can be simply guaged. Love, sacrifice and ego are 3 things which are very difficult to understand from her eyes.

Anger can simply be sensed when she is avoiding or silent but not hyper. When she is hyper at you she is hurt. A woman will always be hyper at you if she is hurt. She will not dump you or leave you, but will try to improve you with maturity and patience(Very rarely shown but it is evident). Eyes speak it all.

She loves unconditionally only expecting love and care in return. By love and care i only mean love and care and not pampering with gifts and excess stuff. She longs for memories and not materialistic things. If you really want to guage a woman give her memories. Sweet memories. If she values those memories she truly loves you and will do anything for you. If she does'nt then she is nothing but a gold digger. A woman will always ask you for gifts but give her memories as gifts and not materialistic things. She will crib for a while but she will always cherish  those memories. If she does not then you know what she is. Love her. Protect her. Care for her. Hurt her only if you have the capabilities to wipe her tears and overcome and stitch the scars she has.

A woman will never show you her pain directly. She will get angry, annoying, possessive, irritating, scolding when she is hurt or is fighting for something. She will portray all her emotions but will never give up or take any help from anybody. She will sacrifice her, time, her strength to protect everything she loves. With sacrifice comes ego. These can only be sensed when she ignores your advice or tries to get your attention to what she has done. She will try to get your attention towards it only once or twice. If you dont she will not display her anger but will make you realise that you are missing something. She will not keep demanding or pushing showing what she had done for you. In her ego she will expect you to be her protector. Her saviour. But actually she wants to be your chariot your saviour. She knows and has the strength to hold you, protect you and lift you up.

A woman is a house of feelings. And all her feelings are portrayed through her eyes. The person who can read her eyes can easily understand what is on her mind. But be careful. She will never accept if you tell her that. She will indirectly do what you say, or smile incessantly, or just be MILDLY possessive of you but never accept. She is always dependent on you even after having the strength much better than you. I guess that  is how nature planned it.

Praise her. Compliment her genuinely. Do tell her about her mistakes. She will accept them. Motivation always brings a woman up. Always show her her strengths. And motivationally her mistakes. Bring her up always.

Look into her eyes and sweep her away with memories full of love and care. Pamper her with trust and understanding and not materialistic things.

I really do not wish to hurt anybody through this post. Sorry if i did. Just my way of understanding Woman i have been with.

Trust

Your entire life boils down to trust. Whom can you trust? Whom can yo not? These are the two questions i have always heard people discuss about.

My question here is How many people trust you?
If you will try to search for this answer you will be left searching and depressed. you will start searching for people. You will start thinking and doubting whether somebody really trusts you or no?

Trust is too big a word, too big an emotion to be handled by humans. Since humans are not perfect nobody can fulfill all the expectations of all the people close to them. Today we expect too many things out of too many people. He should do this for me, he should not do that with me, he should tell me everything, he never shares anything with me. God give me a break. Everybody is tired of answering these questions. But why do these questions arise?

Maybe they arise because you have made mistakes. Maybe they arise because the others have made a mistake and they don't want you to make the same ones. You do 1000 good things you are good. You make 1 mistake and people look at you with suspicion. Let me get this straight-this will have to change. For the 1000 good things he has done the person deserves a chance to justify and identify his mistake. Even we need to understand why the mistake happened. Help him rectify them.Try and understand why he did it. But instead of that all that he gets is a cold angry shoulder.

He has to listen to 1000 different things for the next 1000 days about breaking trust. You did this so i cant trust you. You are surely not here. You are doing something else. These are just a few statements you would have heard from people who SEEM to have lost trust in you.

Trust actually is a very simple thing. Its us who have complicated it to the very core. We trust GOD even when we have not seen him. Is it because we expect something out of him and he always does it? The second he does not grant a wish we hear people saying i have lost trust in GOD. This is what human trust has become. Expectations and not Trust is what has got to us.
Trust as simple as walking with the person without asking where is he taking you. Trust is as simple as not expecting him to do anything for you but believing he will do it and not getting hurt just in case he does not do it.

I cannot trust somebody else because someone else has done this to me. This is the most common thing i have heard. For such scenarios the simplest solution is to leave your ego aside and simply have faith. Or else don't expect anything out of anybody and never trust(which is the most impossible solution). Simply do not expect and trust. If he does it be happy, if not you shouldn't be sad because you never expected anything out of him.

Expectations and too many cases of cheating around us in our surroundings have complicated our lives and filled up our minds with too much of doubt for everyone. Sometimes we trust the person completely and we are right, but too many questions and scenarios around us have made us doubt too many things and we end up ruining our relations.

Life is too simple. Let us not complicate it. I hate the quote people say that trust once broken cannot be got back.

Love Trust are two things which never break if they are true no matter how bad your mistake is. They only strengthen with time and situations. Its all in your head. If you truly loved or trusted somebody love and trust him so much that he thinks twice before breaking your trust ever again.

Sense in simplicity and be true to yourself and everybody.

Listeners.

Good listener Everyone demands a good listener to be present in their lives, but are they themselves good listeners?
Good listeners are non judgemental, straight forward, non egoistic, practical, long term thinkers and with many other qualities people look for in them. But has anybody ever tried to understand what goes in the mind of a good listener?
There is not much of a difference in exortionists and listeners. Exortionists detect the presence of a spirit while listeners sense problems and people holding up stuff in their hearts. Exorcists perform the exorcism while listeners just listen to everything said without providing a judgement but just providing a simple solution. Listeners just have too much on their plate.
Firstly their own problems which are always side tracked. All the different problems and emotions of different other people coming out-right from love issues to house matters to their freedom.

All of these take a dent on the mindset and strength of the listeners. When they practically are in situations all their mind thinks is the different prospects and stories that they have heard. People call this over thinking but then ideally they are the people who make less mistakes. These are the people who provide ideal but harsh or tough solutions but are called as over smart ignorant and rude. Listeners are brilliant people who have the strength to take come what may but sometimes they need listeners too. They too need people who push them and understand and detect what is wrong In them and provide solutions. But they are taken for granted and dumped in a corner and used when needed. This has to change. People have to be patient, non egoistic and open to people with trust and open minds. The listeners too should keep their trust intact and not use the weaknesses of the sharers. I know this is idealistic and not practically possible because of the big ego's but then something has to be done. If we really need a good listener's in our lives we too need to be good listener's in someone else's lives.

I'm all ears :)

Future

Well its been a long time i posted something. Sorry but the problem is ive been thinking way too much about the future. But then suddenly i realised it  was no point wasting time on the future because it was affecting my present. So i said NO TO THE FUTURE.


Lets "Say No to the Future!"

We worry so so much about the future that is so so far away. The world's becoming more random than ever, things are changing faster than ever, nothing can be predicted the way it all used to be. So what's the point in thinking about something far far away when there is nothing that you can really do to be sure of how things will be at that time. Let us try to Say No to the Future! It doesn't mean that you simply stop caring about what's gonna happen in the time to come, but it means that lets put a limit on the number of years from now that we should spend any of our time thinking about. 

So for example, you could set your limit for 2 years, and for now, think actively and plan only for that amount of time. For some, a month itself may be long enough, while for students, setting 6 monthly / yearly targets might be a good thing. This range needs to be decided based on where our life is right now, but the important thing to be understood is that we can't keep setting goals and expectations far away in the future, for more often than not, all such expectations aren't gonna be met. Instead, lets try to live in small parts by looking at only the next few milestones and not the entire road that lies ahead of us.

You see, sometimes, looking at the whole road before starting with a journey can scare you, and make you worry unnecessarily about the twists and turns and potholes that lie ahead. While, problems of course will be there at different times, why should we spend our time right now in worrying about something that MAY happen in the future. The future's far away, lets let it be that way. Lets try to concentrate on life in smaller phases and leave our present worries about the distant future for the distant future itself.

We spend too much unnecessary time worrying about the future, the only way to break that habit is to not see too far ahead and try to live whatever is there right now. (P.S : In some cases, you simply have to think about the very distant future, but in most cases, we can very well do away with it)

Jiyo muskurao khush raho kise pata Kal Ho Na Ho :)

Dad

We usually hear songs and posts and all sorts of praises for our mothers but do we even remember the contribution of our father's?

The chocolates every night, the shoulders that carried you everywhere in the beautiful world, the endless times playing and teaching you outdoor sports are just small things our father's have done for us.

The dreams, the aspirations for us, their devotion and investment for the dreams, his support physically, mentally, financially. His teachings, methods to fight the world, handle finances, fulfill responsibilities with love and care but being harsh too. Him always standing behind you to fight with you in your problems, his happiness at your success, his support and motivation at your failures are all really important things we fail to see.

In the emotions and sacrifices of our mothers we fail to see the most important growth and building block support of our father's.

I still remember the endless number of times when dad supported me. Let me make mistakes and rectified them for me so that I learn. He always stood there like a rock.  His appreciation when I scored a 92 in my 10th, his anger and concern when I scored low in the 12th. He was strict showing me my mistake but he made me stand by helping me take my branch of interest.

Still remember all the gadgets he bought for me fighting mommy for me. Listening to the endless curses she put on him. His vision for me. His astrological predictions aand and warnings for me which were always bang on, his understanding of my love affair and his unsuccessful attempt of patching it back.

Miss his whistles that woke me up in the morning, miss his phone call at 9 at night asking me to pick him up, the 10 minute drive describing our day's going to each other, his way of feeding the worst veggies in the best possible way but what I miss most is his innocent sweet happy nature which taught me honesty and hard work showing me that struggles with hard work always give you sweet fruits.

Miss his signature on my job offer letter,  teaching me the different scenarios and rituals of life. His systematic nature, straightforward working and his easy go attitude is always remembered at every juncture.

Miss you daddy. Keep blessing me and guiding me always. Always loved.

Life an unknown journey.

 Life. Well everyone defines it in their own way. Some say it's a journey, some say we have been sent to help others, while some say the human form is the lowest tier of hell and God's way of improving and uplifting the soul. My view about life is a combination of all but follows none.

     

      Life is all about perspective. How you look at things. Something big for someone is small for another. Life is too long a journey into the unknown. Nobody knows what lies forward or what are the consequences of the past and present actions. Life is all about perspective-how you look at things in your past present and how do you apply that to the unknown future that lies infront of you. The best thing a person can do in life is share his entire life history with a stranger who is ready to lend a ear and be Non-judgemental. 

      Life begins at birth. You have no perspective or any understanding about perspective. Youfollow the understanding and perspectives of your parents,your guardians. You pick up the teachings of your surroundings. Your teachings and surroundings decide your character and behaviour for the rest of your life. Your behaviour will change but the core character of a person always remains the same. The innocence, the peace, the love, the care, the smiles, the cries, the long 12 hour sleep is a beautiful journey into the unknown journey of growing up. Life goes on.

     
      You reach the adolescent stage, you believe you are big enough to fight and rule the world. You want everybody to listen to believing you right without thinking about the perspective and repurcussions of your behaviour. You want to independently take all the decisions of your life. That is good. But somewhere you have to realise the thin line in between being independent and being a rebel. But we just tread into the beautiful unknown journey of life.
     
      Then comes a stage where we are attracted to the opposite Gender. Relationships, marriage. All we think about is the beauty of the other person. The care, love, happy moments, memories,and the fun part of it without thinking about compatibility. For someone the perspective of compatibility is love and care while for someone is equivalent looks while for someone it is materialistic things. But then all we do is just tread into the beautiful unknown journey of life.
     
      Work, Responsibilities,Kids, Old Age, Retirement and ultimately death seems to be the agenda of the unknown journey. But according to me there is a hidden agenda of life. Experience the beauty of life. Experience all the emotions of life and enjoy them. Happiness, sadness, success, failure and have the capacity and smile to endure through each. We are here to help everyone and share every emotion. You are happy share your happiness and make others happy. Someday when your low and sad the almighty(or naturally for atheists) sends someone somewhere and makes you happy.                             

Whatever we do, whatever we earn remains here. Be it friends, money, fame,relations all stay here but satisfaction always touches the soul and keeps it at peace. And satisfaction comes through smiles.
Hence life is an unknown journey to be completed with smiles.

A wise man once said you can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it. What he meant is nothing comes without a price. So before you go into battle, you better decide how much you’re willing to lose.

Therefore always remember, when something goes something comes and when something comes something is about to go.

Be independent and not a rebel. Keep everyone happy and stay happy and satisfied.

Keep Smiling :)

Relationships.

STATUTORY WARNING: This post is not on the relationships you are thinking about.

    This post is completely based upon the different relationships and relations we build throughout our life. The base question for this post has been asked by every person in his life "Why do People leave us and Go?"

    We build relationships all along our life. At birth we have parents. The strongest, purest and best relation of our life. Everything we do is unconditional. We love, we fight-for each other and sometimes against each other,we support, we share, we hide but in the end we have an attachment we have with nobody else. But suddenly one day when your relationship with your father is at its peak, or when your mother is really proud of your achievements, or when both of them are really angry at you because you are married against their choice you suddenly lose them. They are no more there. You keep searching for them in times of your needs. Then tear your hair apart for a few days but then just move on to a new solution in life. You acknowledge them and their works after their they are gone. 

    Why cannot you acknowledge them when they are alive and give them a little smile and happiness?

    We grow up. Make friends. Some good, some bad and some the best. We talk we share we have fun. We spend the most happy and most cherished moments of our lives with them. Share everything-from underwears to chocolates to secrets to crushes oooppsss not underwears :p. I hope you get what im trying to say. But we soon start taking them for granted. We expect them to be there and do things for us without us doing anything for them. We do not acknowledge them. We make new friends, do the same things with the new  ones forgetting that there are some impeccable old diamonds which are standing for you as always which you have ignored.
       Why cant we acknowledge them, and be selfless and help genuinely and keep the true essence of friendship attached?

     We grow up more. Make love relations. They pamper us with love, affection and care and anything else that they can. We take up all the care and be happy, but the day they expect the same love affection care and everything else we think they have become selfish and breakup with them.
       Why cant we just reciprocate true love and not show ego?

In our entire life people just leave us and go. They use us break us and just leave us with scars. But then you have a beautiful gem of a son or friend or partner which is always there in your life. Because of all the scars we just leave all the doors tightly shut for them without knowing that they are there for us always. We keep searching searching searching but in the end just forget to look behind the close doors. There is desperation to build new doors but just forget to unlock the old scars.
    Major people will leave but rare people stay. Find them and do everything you can for them because they too will always be there for you.

This is dedicated to all the people who have been my strength throughout my life where people just left.
Thanks MOM, Vibha, Anushree, Pulkit, Lavanya and the most precious and special Anant.
Happy Birthday Pops. Hope you stay with me always. Thanks a ton for always being there in everything.
Happiness, success, failures, crimes, (no sadness because you have the knack of converting them to light hearted situations)

Keep appreciating, loving, caring, and maintain the true essence of friendship. 

   

Ego

Ego is one of the most destructive feeling of a human being.Attitude, anger, hunger for power, jealousy, favours, supremacy, inferiority complex, bitching, unhealthy competition degradation and insult in public are just few things which are caused of EGO.
Where does the ego generate from? I have generally observed people who grow big from nothing without major struggle have a very big ego because they do not Value their struggle and betimes nobody is as great as they are forgetting a lot of people have struggles similar to theirs. People ridicule, degrade, curse one they are in possession of power.

People generally misuse this power to fulfill their selfish needs. why cannot people control their ego's? Just like any other feeling ego can be controlled. Ignore the feelings of jealousy,superiority,inferiority complex etc. and just have healthy competition. Accept you defeat sportingly guaging your mistakes and compete to be better than before rather than pulling the other person down. pa humble at your victory thanking everybody who has helped you achieve your goals.

A few people today have the big ego's and hunger for power. Yes, they are technologically and intellectually very strong but Only because of their hunger and power they cannot poke into others matters. Helping peacefully uplo a certain enteut is ok but bringing your ego in front and bragging about power is meters and always leads to soul relations. Justifying their actions these people add Salt to the injuries of the weaker and then brag to the world about their helping hand.

Simply be independent humble and competitive.
There is no excellence without labour.

The kid in you

Everyone has two sides in them.

According to me its not the good and bad side, its the kid in You and the mature guy in you. Generally as people grow up they start ignoring the Kid in them. I don't understand why do people do that? Your parents say grow up, you go into the corporate world , your boss says grow up, your society says grow up. BUT why should I grow up?

The biggest mistake people make is ignore the kid in them under the pressure of handling responsibilities. According to me the kid in you is the best and only solution to handle responsibilities. We tend to complicate things using our over mature non-kiddish mind for any problems increasing pressure and stress.
Think and behave like a kid. But do not Overdo it as well. Maintain balance. Jump in water puddles, get wet in the rain, sleep on your mom's lap asking her to sing you a lullaby, play and travel around with your father, Run around and play in the park with your kids, teach young poor kids, but the best thing is to make children Smile doing silly kiddish behaviour.

Have you observed how kids behave when they want something? They Search for it, fight for it but do not plot to get it. They honestly struggle for it. Have you observed how they reach out when things are out of their reach? They extend their reach either by stretching themselves or by smartly using different things to reach, but they do not lose hope.

The way they sleep without any stress and tension is something we really need to learn and implement soon. The way kids instinctively handle problems is one thing I am really inspired by. They do not overthink and create problems which are never there in the first place.

All I am trying to say is behave like a kid and easily Solve your problems rather than behaving maturely and lncrease your problems.

Chota bachcha samajhke humko na behelana re...

Friendship

Friendship,the bond of two souls. BULLSHIT.

Major people want to be Pampered and want attention and thereby act dual faced. They want everything their way but do not want to return the Same compassion in return. They will irritate you, poke you, want to pull your leg every Now and then be interested in all your gossip pull you down during your bad times take credit for you success, associate themselves with you for your success. But the day you do any of the above bullshit with them you will be termed as irritating pest, you will be gossiped about as a useless moron Ignored by their so called fake groupism.

The question that always hits my mind is why have friendships when you want behave in a dual face and fake friendships and things.

Be who you are, be straight forward instead of hiding things. If people accept you the way you are they are your true friends.Is It? Along with that you need to be open about your negative feelings about each other but also sportingly accept it without any ego or negative feelings.
The major thing that hurts me to see is people behave differently on the face and differently behind their backs.

They behave differently with their friends around different people and in different situations. Why cant you behave normal in all in situations with your friends??

Everybody want recognition but you wont get any until you recognize the others the Same way you want to be recognized. The true value of friendship and love have been changed completely for materialistic and selfish needs. People use friends as a ladder to climb the storeys' of success and then kick you out as if you are garbage, forgetting one day you might be treated the same way one day.

Life in a metro

Mumbai the best city to live in.Well I am not saying this because l live here but because of hundreds of beautiful things in this city.

The fast paced life, the continuous running trains, non-stop business, the disciplined fast paced traffic(except the moronic rickshaw drivers) which is easily balanced by the never ending calm Arabian Sea. Spending the weekend with your loved ones at Marine Drive or chowpatty beach or Versova Beach or the Juhu Beach watching the Sun set calms and balances your entire weeks' stress and fast paced life.

The only thing that keeps it running is the MUMBAI LOCAL. You learn every life principle and basics in the trains. From making new relations to discussions on running a businesses the Gujrati way, to discussions on the share market. From bhajans to making garlands, from arguments to helping hands, to the never say die and keep fighting spirit is all found on the Mumbai Local.

The city transforms and builds You into a completely different personality. Mature, smart, chic, understanding, fashionable, outstanding in every aspect but most importantly ready to struggle and succeed.

The city has a balance of a metropolitan city and a beautiful scenic island. The city is fast and full of beautiful smart people. The city of dreams does fulfill everyones dreamsfrom the first house to first promotion to the first car.

Love the city and it will always love you back. Kyunki Ye Hai Bumbai Meri Jaan.

Happiness

The most frequent question I have heard people asking Is how to be happy.

Well acording to me happiness and Sadness are just a frame Of mind and how you percieve situations. Big problems have large struggles but at the end of these problems with patience lead to profound satisfaction and indirectly happiness. small things too lead to happiness. A walk around the beach, listening to romantic songs(calming peaceful songs and not the loud passionate music.) making your parents proud by helping them with small things, playing around with small kids watching them smile. Satisfaction leads to a smile and smiling to happiness.

Happiness and satisfaction is generally got by innocent Smiles,generally helping people without any selfish motives or anything in return. People today generally, purposely land people into trouble and then bail them out forcing them to return favours.

Happiness is always found in giving and not selfishly expecting favours. Yes, the world does use you and doubt You when you work and help them without asking anything in return. Keep calm and  patiently help with a smile. Help everybody and forget, but if you are expecting anything, always remember you are moving towards a fresher and purer soul and indirectly to satisfaction and happiness. Happiness is a state of mind. Help others with a clean mind and conscience and enjoy a satisfied Soul. Keep smiling and spread Smiles.

Life

Life.
Changes every second. Happiness now sadness the next second. But what remains constant is us.But The basic question still remains What is LIFE?

Life is a cycle of struggle And happiness. The more you struggle for a long time, The better returns you get. The cycle just goes on. when You find happiness, cherish it because sadness is around the corner. The best way to deal with any sadness is to expect Some Sadness to come your way. weird i guess but that  what has helped me stay strong all this while with all the struggles and responsibilities at hand.

Patience is to biggest virtue needed by a person to lead a peaceful and happy life. Along with patience a no expectation attitude is important in life. The more you Expect the more sadness you have to fare as EXPECTATIONS are generally not met leaving us with sour relationships and hatred in all hearts. just do the best you can without expecting will lead you to satisfaction and good Karma leading to Peace. life is not tuff. Nor one to Circumstances. Its Our patience and mindset that make it Tuff. 

KEEP CALM AND DO G00D KARMA.